Yesterday morning, after a relatively sleepless night, I cried and cried and freaked out and cried and yelled a little and cried some more. Then I took the day off of work because I was in no shape to go in. After letting all of it out, I feel much better. I think I’m going to head in a new direction from here.
I’m going to stop buying crap. I buy a lot of crap. I don’t need to do that anymore. I am currently suffering from buyers remorse for having bought an iPhone with my tax refund, for example. I realize that owning an iPhone has made me no happier. I could have spent that 500 dollars paying off bills and eliminated some stress in my life instead. That would make me happier.
But I still want crap, so my solution, I suppose, is to make crap, because I like crafting, and that will make me happy. Its hard to squeeze in time to craft with my son, but I will be able to do it, if only slowly. Currently I’m working on making a few slings for my sister and a friend at work who are both having babies. I am also embroidering some burp cloths for my sister, hopefully she will like those. Today I downloaded some patterns to make different kinds of slings, so I think I’m going to try those out next. I want to enhance both my sewing skills, and my baby wearing skills.
I also found a pattern for knitting the international breastfeeding symbol.
Pretty sweet, huh? I don’t know what I’m going to put it on yet but watch out! (Thats not the actual pattern, of course, its just the symbol, if you want the pattern – which is also good for cross stitch and beading – just let me know and I’ll send it to you)
For my own sanity, I’m going to move even further in the direction of natural and attachment parenting. What I’m doing now just isn’t working for me, and the more I read about attachment parenting, the more it seems to make sense for me. Last night, for example, my son and I slept much better in the same bed. We coslept the whole time I was on maternity leave, but when I went back to work my mom suggested I start putting him in the crib. That’s just not working out for us, so he’s coming back into my bed.
Now if only I could pump more breast milk in a day and eliminate the formula usage …